=> if0nly Life Was Fantasy.

Out of these ashes Beauty Will Rise.

2011-11-22T23:42:00.002-05:00

=> Sometimes the best things in life, the most treasured are those that are the result of a wreck. I’m not saying a wreck as in “Oh yesterday was such a bad day,” but wreck as in absolute shambles where your world seems to be in hopeless despair. Steven Curtis Chapman embodied this phenomenon perfectly in his song Beauty Will Rise from his album of the same name, written in memory of his daughter Maria Sue.

“But buried deep beneath,

Of all our broken dreams we have is hope.

Out of these ashes beauty will rise,

And we will dance among the ruins,

We will see it with our own eyes.

Out of these ashes beauty will rise,

For we know joy is coming in the morning.

In the morning, beauty will rise.”

=> As another age old song goes, “Ashes to ashes we all fall down.” Yes, we may all fall down but at the end of the day, from those ashes we will rise again as something renewed and more magnificent than ever.

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Potter Points.

2011-11-13T03:10:00.002-05:00

=> Yes, on my study breaks I look up Potter stuff.

=> Why those little... 2012 version it is!... Even if the world is going to end a month after it comes out! (2012 re-release)

Aka what every Potterhead was thinking when they went to Orlando (WWOHP additions)

JK = the mastermind of logic & plot lines (Lily-Narcissa) (Hagrid)

Well considering how they couldn't event get THAT right -_- (“The only really important thing is that his eyes look like his mother’s eyes. So if you’re casting Lily, there needs to be a resemblance, but they don’t absolutely have to be green.”)

That shall be all for now =)

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

As Blogger And Tumblr Becomes One.

2011-11-01T00:52:00.003-04:00

=> eeeee! More Tumblr Potter on Blogger!!

=> conwinkydink that i do those spirally things as doodles? i think not <3 http://bellatrix-is-a-star.tumblr.com/post/723387329/lady-lestrange-via-fuckyeahdeatheaters

for some reason i REALLY like this pic... http://phoenix-felicis.tumblr.com/post/6029273408

from http://bellatrix-is-a-star.tumblr.com/post/727945564/long-long-long-hp-survey :

Long, long, long HP survey.

Name Maggie

Are You Obbsessed With Harry Potter? uh... DUH!

Could You Prove That Statement In Court? uh... DUH!

Do You Know Any Of The Characters Middle Name’s? uh... DUH!

What’s Hermione’s? Jean

What’s Ron’s? Bilius

What’s Harry’s? James

What’s Ginny’s? Molly

What’s Your Ship? Dramione, Harry/Luna (yes, I live in my own little fanficy world)

What’s Not Your Ship? Harry/Ginny (this is just wrong on soooo many levels)

Have You Seen All The Movies? uh... DUH!

Read All The Books? uh... DUH!

What Do You Think Of JKR? *faints*

Favorites

Weasley? hm... Charlie! (ps. do you think he'll send be a dragon because I said he was my favourite?)

Character, Overall? Luna & Bellatrix

Adult? Bellatrix

Professor? Flitwick!

Sweet? Sugar Quills

Place? By the Black Lake

Weasley Twin? BUT BUT BUT....

Least Favorites

Weasley? Hugo (iunno never got a good feel off that kid...)

Student? Flint... he was kinda pointless...

Sweet? BUT BUT BUT... it's SUGAR!!

Professor? well no shit everyone's gonna say Umbridge

Couples? Harry/Ginny (aka see "What's Not Your Ship?")

Ron/Hermione? She would've been better with Harry... but I mean what can I do about it, I'm not JK unfortunately

Harry/Ginny? again, re: "What's Not Your Ship"

Ron/Lavander? tool.

Hermione/Krum? I always pictured Krum to be better looking than in the movie... ie http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tim_Rozon or http://www.imdb.com/name/nm2301213/ or you know...

Tonks/Lupin? Cute in it's own Potter / metaphoric way

Draco/Pansy? Disturbing...

Fred/Angelina? ok... this was mentioned like ONCE...

Bill/Fleur? Cutest thing since little kids in Halloween costumes

Harry/Cho? in the book it made sense... in the movies it was like "dot dot dot"

This Or That?

Ron or Harry? Harry

Hermione or Ginny? Hermione

Neville or Seamus? SEAMUS!

Snape or Slughorn? hm... toughie... both?

Fred Or George? BUT BUT BUT!!!!!!!! (see above)

ButterBeer or Fire Whiskey? well Universal didn't have Firewhiskey... or that I knew of... so I really can't say

Zonko’s or Weasley’s Wizarding Wheezes? WWW

Hog’s Head Or The Three Broomsticks? The Three Broomsticks, less shady (I've had enough shadyness to last a lifetime)

James/Lily or Snape/Lily? James/Lily (the movie killed Snape/Lily for me)

Hogwarts or Hogsmeade? Hogwarts

Hogsmeade Or Diagon Alley? Diagon Alley

Malfoy Manor or Knockturn Alley? Malfoy's (with Draco in it of course ;) )

Bertie Bott’s or Fizzing Whizbees? Bertie Bott's

Witch Weekly Or The Daily Prophet? Daily Prophet

Rita Skeeter or Barty Crouch? Jr or Sr? Jr had that kinda badass thing going on that suited him quite nicely

Gyrffindor or Ravenclaw? Ravenclaw (for Luna of course!)

Random

Have you Been to A Realese Party? Nope

Ever cried While reading one of the books? Nope

A Movie? YES YES YES X100000000 only every single freakn time that I've watched part 2!

Books or Movies? books

Had A Dream About Harry Potter? Surprisingly no

Been To A Fansite? uh... DUH!

Been to JKR’s Site? uh... DUH!

Have You Ever Roleplayed? BAHAHAHAHAHA... do Jenga pieces count?

Did you use to have an absurd theory? meh, it was too complicated for me so I just let JK do the thinking =)

What was it? ---

Did you/Do you hide your obbsession? Nope

Ever dressed up like a Character? For Halloween or Just No Reason at all? Nope

Ever noticed That You can’t “Spell Hermione without Ron”? so I've been told

Have you noticed That Lily Evans And Ginny Weasley are alot alike? yes, ergo my non-ship? DUH!

Do you know What fanfiction is? uh... DUH!

Ever Been To A Fanfiction site? uh...DUH!

Do you read fanfiction? uh... DUH! (ok obviously if one is going to take the time to do this questionnaire, they're probably mega Potter fans and therefore these questions don't need to be asked)

Are you a member of a fanfiction site? uh... DUH!

Ever had Harry Potter Candy? does butterbeer count?

Do you own a lot of Harry Potter Stuff? not enough

Do you have Harry Potter Scene It? until they come out with one that's all years, i ain't buying it

Do You Have A Harry Potter Shirt? technically

What Character Are You Most Often Compared Too? Luna

Do You Agree With This? Yes

Do You Have Any Nicknames That Have To Do With Harry Potter? Luna?

Are Your freinds Supportive of your obbsession? uh... DUH!

Do you relate a lot of things to Harry Potter? uh... DUH!

Last Few

Do you love being Obbsessed With Harry Potter? uh... DUH!

Do you wish that you went to Hogwarts? uh... DUH!

Have you re-read the books? yes yes yes yes yes yes (the hardcover fell off one of them...)

Have you had A Harry Potter Themed Party? not yet, it's on my to do list though

Have You Had An RP Party? No

Well..Do You Like Ron& Hermione as A couple? meh

Harry and Ginny? no no no and no -_-

=> What was this post triggered by? My roommate and I watching HP1 on Halloween night of course!!

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

A Post Of Midterm Motivators (Potter Version).

2011-10-22T02:05:00.002-04:00

You know you sang it too ;) http://acciomalfoy.tumblr.com/post/10429816677
:p http://acciomalfoy.tumblr.com/post/10348176429
same way goes for Friends references!! http://acciomalfoy.tumblr.com/post/10301528808
IT WAS OMGF-INGHILARIOUS!! http://acciomalfoy.tumblr.com/post/9937832251
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE??!?!?! http://acciomalfoy.tumblr.com/post/9824441276
for harmony… unfortunately this isn’t deviantart… http://acciomalfoy.tumblr.com/post/10613670483
Heeheeeehee http://acciomalfoy.tumblr.com/post/11206477144
i… i… yea… http://acciomalfoy.tumblr.com/post/10997845451
see iunno if it was trying to depict that he doesn’t have a lot of clothes… but like… 13 and 17 is a very big age difference… http://acciomalfoy.tumblr.com/post/10962542991 he has a number of jackets though… =)
I would say so heehee even if I don’t, well hey at least my last day will be with those two muahahah http://acciomalfoy.tumblr.com/post/10961514115
“but I AM the chosen one” oh gosh that scene cracks me up every time, I swear Dan should do some comedies one day cause like it's not just that ONE scene that always cracks me up... a lot of harmony scenes though actually... http://acciomalfoy.tumblr.com/post/10833680221
Um… can I imagine that that said Tom instead? http://acciomalfoy.tumblr.com/post/10786940898
I would go and watch it for shiz, like legit for shiz especially if the cast made cameos especially the one who suggested it ;) http://acciomalfoy.tumblr.com/post/11415283408
ludding AHAHAHA I still prefer drapple http://acciomalfoy.tumblr.com/post/9671529806
pshft http://acciomalfoy.tumblr.com/post/9589234758

=> Every day I be Huffleling!!

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

A Post Of Post-Potter Madness.

2011-10-01T01:18:00.005-04:00

http://britta-perry.tumblr.com/post/7910528189

heehee http://ruperts.tumblr.com/post/7327723776/not-my-daughter-you-bitch-not-my-daughter-you

=> Sleep time? Probably =)

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Dramione My Oh My.

2011-09-23T02:09:00.004-04:00

=> I was reading a Dramione fanfic the other day (as I always seem to be doing nowadays) and thought this little passage was quite cute. It put a sm:)e on my face. If it's not understandable as is, it will be if read in context (aka read the linked fanfic).

"Fiction is fiction because the characters are figments of the authors' imaginations. It doesn't mean that what happens to the characters can't happen to you. Say the fictional character eats a banana. The fictional character won't come alive and eat a banana, hence it is fiction. It doesn't mean eating a banana is a fictional action that can never be done." -idina

Fic can be found here... if not already found by the gazillion hyperlinks I put in. www.fanfiction.net/s/7373106/1/Irony

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Why You Kill Dobby.

2011-09-16T02:07:00.002-04:00

=> I feel like I'm using blogger to post something that I would post on Tumblr... if I had Tumblr...

"J.K. Rowling, I was fine when you said that Harry's parents were dead. Fine, when you killed Sirius. Okay, when you killed Hedwig and Mad-Eye. A little mad when you killed Dumbledore. BUT YOU CROSSED THE LINE BY KILLING DOBBY!!!!!!!!!!" from http://thelifeandtrials.blogspot.com/2011/02/harry-potter-and-unneccesary-sequel.html

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Take Me To Disney, I Want Mick St. John.

2011-09-15T00:19:00.003-04:00

=> Only in Fantasyland. In Fantasyland, no troubling troubles would exist. Only the troubles that you want to exist will, ie. what should I have for dinner tonight? What colour should I use for this friendship bracelet? Troubles that make you over think, cause emotional pain, be put in a funk until you've had a a few shots and 3 hours of Alex O'Loughlin, munchies, and a few fanfics... would not exist. If that were the case, the life would be the best thing since Coconut Cloud Cakes. Too bad Fantasyland doesn't exist and the closest thing is Magic Kingdom WDW.

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

One Thing That's Continuous.

2011-09-11T23:45:00.002-04:00

=> If there's one thing that you can bet on is that I for shiz won't ever be excited for homework no matter what my goals are. There will always be that thing that I'd find more interesting to do than to start... but then once I actually start then that's a different story. Let's just say that at that time, I can probably compete against the Energizer Bunny.

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,

- Mag.

Strange Things On Blogger Com.

2011-09-10T23:51:00.003-04:00

=> Okay... well that was a horrid attempt at spoofing Strange Days at Blake Holsey High for the title of this post...

=> It is however extremely strange though that out of my 3 blogs on this account (not that I have another account anyways), the one with the most view is the one that I will never post to again as it was created for an English project a few years ago. Well I guess albeit, the blog's about one of the Pretty Little Liars books (Wanted) and so with the show's ever growing popularity, the books and thus everything related to them will get attention as well. Oh c'est vie.

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,

- Mag.

The Future As A Fantasy.

2011-09-10T23:41:00.000-04:00

=> We constantly dream about doing something, our fantasy, what we strive towards. That something, our goal becomes our future. I like this feeling, of my dream, my fantasy, my goal as an OT getting closer and closer with each day. This is what keeps me going when the studying's got me down. The fact that after this lab, after this exam, after this course, after this year, I WILL be one step closer.

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Leaving Life But Returning To Life.

2010-10-27T03:09:00.003-04:00

=> Hi there again. So I would guess the bad news is that I no longer have a life... I'm studying / in class like a good 16 hours of the day... I think if I remember correctly. Good news (hopefully?) I that I've found my way back to my blogs (ie. this one & if0nly On Ice. [check the sidebar / dashboard / whatever it's called]).

=> I hate to be depressing and all that, especially on my first post back, but it's really what drove me back; just needed somewhere / something to write it out, say it "aloud" so to speak.

=> Why of all times, why now. What on freaking earth now? Right in the middle of midterms, a few days before my 3 back to backs? WHY!? I don't even know what's going on either. I havn't been like this since a good two / three years ago and even then upon some talking it though for a while I was able to find the "cause" and have some relief upon that. Nope, apparently not this time though. This time there's nothing, it's just me, myself, and my distracting thoughts. You know what sucks most too? It's not even April!!

=> Anyways, Mags out. Hopefully I'll be tired enough to get some sleep tonight before the long long long day tomorrow.

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Bit By Bit.

2009-10-19T02:17:00.004-04:00

=> ok well so school is super busy especially with scholarships and all *sigh*. there's been so much stress that my stomach acid's been acting up again and once again it feels like i'm getting stabbed.

=> i decided a while ago that perhaps poem by poem i begin to post all my works up on here. just as another way to track them anyways and perhaps even elaborate on them.

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Liam Eyes.

2009-09-23T19:12:00.004-04:00

=> well now that school's started up again...
actually it's not that bad since my semester's pretty light, it's next semester that has all the science stuff. but oh em gee i miss him so much! and Liam & his eyes oh my oh my, people at my school really seem to like his backpack. i keep seeing it and going in my mind, "what the...Liam's back?" but of course, life isn't fantasy; Liam's gone who knows where...well actually i'm pretty sure he's going to BC like tomorrow or something.

anyways::::::: Uni Fair is back again, at least this time i won't be going in crutches.

if0nly Liam's Eyes Were Still Here.,
- Mag.

From Hong Kong To Final Year.

2009-09-09T01:14:00.001-04:00

=> so to continue my Hong Kong experience 09, I’ll just start off by saying oh em gee it was way too hot and humid. Melted pretty much every single day and as if that wasn’t bad enough, there were 2 typhoons at level 8 and one at level 9. At least I had fun on the day the level 9 hit. While everyone was leaving Ocean Park once it started pouring, me plus family went upwards to the top of the mountains where all the aquariums were. As for HK being shopping lala land? Ptsh yea right, everything there was pretty much the same as here when they’re on sale. Well like yea there are a number of things there that are fairly cheap ie wholesale, knock-offs via bargaining.

Mid-way through the trip, we went to Thailand with 2 of my cousins. Simply put, it made me miss Hong Kong. Honestly like no offence to Thais but Thailand was fairly nauseating…call me a spoiled Canadian. See now I would totally exploit all their tourism scams on here but a) I don’t want to get hunted down b) it’s too nauseating to write about.
After 5 days of “omg can’t wait to get back to HK and actually not feel like throwing up every 2 seconds,” we were finally back to HK. But before that, we had to get onto the plane. FYI when in the Thai airport, go through customs at the last 10 mins before boarding or else like me, you’ll end up stuck on a bridge like thing with nothing to do; no washrooms, eatery, chairs, nothing. On the plane though was the most adorable little girl sitting behind us. I chatted a bit with her dad and found out that they were with the Hong Tai tours and even he thought that our tour was ridiculous in comparison to theirs. We were with Kwan Geen (or something translated like that) btw. Well lesson learnt, never go on a tour with them again; ‘kwan geen kwan sum lai’ is their motto which translates to Kwan Geen cares for you, ptsh well I think their motto should be ‘kwan geen kwan sum cheen’ which translates to Kwan Geen cares about money.

Once back in HK it was the same old same old, too hot and humid. Although I’m so thankful (hallelujah) that where I was staying (one of my uncle’s) had a piano so I was able to cram/practice for my exam set for Aug. 22.

At last, home sweet home. But just as quickly, I was sitting on the piano bench for hours cramming to pick back up my 2 studies, list D piece, and all my technique. So after two weeks, the moment of truth, the exam. I did relatively well, I knew I wasn’t going to pass with flying colours but I was pretty confident that I at least marginally passed. Low and behold, results came in around two weeks later and I passed with a 67 =)

=> that’s pretty much my whole summer. Two months summed up into 5 paragraphs.
The most productive though I have to admit was probably this weekend. On Friday I went with my sister, Leon and Lexx to Ikea to pick up some cabinets and so I spent the weekend finally at last putting my room together. It’s still not fully done yet, but getting there, just missing the final touches.
The most unexpected of my summer was becoming (co)-chair of my fellowship. It was weird because I went into the meeting thinking to drop my position as secretary, not be part of the servant team anymore but still attend the meetings. Iunno it seems like God totally handed me this position on a golden platter cause being chair will no doubt help me in the future and even for universities which at the moment I need all the help I can get. It’s true though I still really care about my kiddies in my fellowship especially after talking to each and every one of them every week via weekly email updates. Meanwhile my parents are just worried I won’t be able to juggle it with school and piano, iunno we’ll see but I do believe that I’m in this position for a reason and my Heavenly Daddy knows that I can do it.

=> and now it’s almost time to bid farewell to UHS. 10 more months before I no longer am a high school student (unless I stay another year). Way back when we were just entering high school you hear about how high school’s the best 4 years of your life (or on the contrary the worst 4 years), but honestly not much really happened. I have no clue what’ll happen this year but the last 3 can be summed up quite easily.
Make new friends but keep the old, one is silver and the other’s gold (via Girl Guides).
Rekindle an broken friendship, break a new friendship.
Get played by one, you play another, be the other woman to the third.
Life lessons learnt to determine your future.
I just realised, these four lines actually each represent one year, well generally anyways. Anywho, it’ll be the beginning of the new school year tomorrow. New niners, new seniors, new circle of life. With this I bid thee a belated one year celebration of i0lwf.

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Notes When To Hong Kong 09.

2009-09-08T21:46:00.006-04:00

=> so well...it's been a while. so i guess all i can say is it's gonna be a long post. fyi, it's kind of in "real time" so pretty much just started typing again in one continuous whenever during the flight. also remember, i was pretty much only 1/2 awake during the whole thing so may not bee too coherent; so much so that even i was getting comfused when re-reading to type this out.

=> (via typed out on phone over a span of 5 hours, july 7th?ish) we're off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of hong kong. so i found out that if the plane isn't steady aka if it's an airbus, i get terrible airsickness. lucky that was only for the super short flight to chicago for connecting. the 747 was sooo much better and steadier (given that after take off on the airbus i was pretty much sitting there trying not to pass out from dizziness and on the 747 i'm able to do whatever including type this >< )

lessons learnt so far: airbuses make me sick & never open cup noodles with the opening towards yourself. oce second i was a-ok, the next second i had cup noodle seasoning in my eye. they're tasting not bad, a bit too salty but it IS cup noodle after all. also learnt that inside o'hera airport my keybo can't text. grrr. oh well i'll try again when i land [added note: can't text in hk either].

as for in flight movies, 3 tv shows from discovery channel so didn't understand it too much especailly given the fact that i didn't have the earphones in either. then watched He's Just Not That Into You which is just this onee huge love web. it doesn't help either that 2 of the guys looked pretty alike except for that one had highlights. but but but, it was a good movie (btw the dragon's lair guy from sisterhood looked sooo much better in sisterhood than here). then it was a Renée Zellweger movie, New In Town...yea wasn't paying attention at all and was getting tired so no clue what the movie was about. i do know though that it was about her being new in a town that's cold. well then, after that was a drgaon ball z movie, dragonball revolution. the actors all look familiar but didn't know what on earth was going on in the movie. there were orange balls that were very orb-like and then there were those air moving stuff that are colourful and they shoot at each other. there was some guy that was called grotto or gruto or soemthing that sounded familiar...anyways, whatever.

6 hours until landing and we're above syberia [added note: or so that's what we were told]! guess what we saw? land, plateau, emptinessy stuff, and LOTS of rivers and ponds that were semi coated with ice. there was possibly ONE village and a main road. of course not 100% of it really was pure emptyness since we're way up in the sky. and then guess what!? there was a river that spelt out 'plage'...oh snap...just realised that plauge was a U. does 'plare' mean anything? hmm... oh well your pick; it spelt something like that.

monsters vs aliens was on by the time i was getting bored of syberia. it was pretty good. we couldn't remember who did the voicing so we were thinking jennifer love hewitt but then found out via credits that it was reese witherspoon. *sigh* missing The Listener and my lovely CSIs, cntm's finale's next week too. oh! there's 5 movies, though i think that it said that there were only only to be 4. oh well, s'all good! lalalal yea i've eaten enough cranberries to last me a very long time. but do you know what's not gonna last me a long time? yea can't think of one just now either lol. so just found out that the movie's called Last Chance Harvey, well whatever i'm getting tired, gonna take another nap before landing. so apparently i really do have a problem with getting really warm right as and when i fall asleep so now i can't sleep again. took a 20 minute mini nap? i guess i'll just watch harvey then.

=> after a short while we landed in HK. as soon as we stepped off the plane, we died of the humidity and that night was the 1st of 3 typhoons during out trip.

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

End Of An Era.

2009-06-27T23:40:00.002-04:00

=> seems like not too long ago that i started this blog but it's actually have already been 9 or 10 months, almost a year! *gasp*
well guess what?! that's also how long the school year is!!! so that means, *drumroll* SCHOOL'S DONE!! or well for now, until September. new niner next year too muahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

=> sometimes there's things that you're better off not knowing...but yet you're glad in a way that you know.

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Me-Me & Za-Za. <33

2009-06-26T23:45:00.003-04:00

=> i absolutely LOVE these kids. i've been following the blog (and read quite a number of past posts if not all of them) pretty much since i began this blog. props hannah!

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

How On Earth.

2009-06-07T22:30:00.002-04:00

=> i have seven (and counting) little cuts on my hand, mainly the left. i have NO clue how they got there. my best guess is that because i've been washing my hands so much at co-op (physio clinic) that they're cracking...but they don't seem THAT dry to me. the only thing my hand washing seems to be affecting is my fingers growing 6-packs...but then again, it happens every year. my dermatologist says it's a form of eczema. me loves me dermatologist, he's really really really nice and has his own research lab and seminars and assist UT or something. =)

=> H17BD MOOSE! well in like 2 1/2 hours...i love how we wrapped her gifts. mine in a doodled over future shop flyer and exeye's in a mickydee's bag; but you know how we're all going green nowadays. ;)

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

It's Hard.

2009-05-27T01:24:00.003-04:00

=> life is hard. sometimes you've just gotta suck it up. how do we suck it up? i have NO clue.
so i had to talk to she who must not be named last friday...to get closure...yea cause that went great. and now apparently i need to find it within myself to let myself to trust her again. which sucks cause i have no clue how to make myself do that. afraid to let my gaurd down; but then again who wouldn't be afraid after such a betryal.
so i came back home...had a vex...then filled that bottle with 3:4-ish bailey's.
then s just had to tell my pastor i was drinking...who told my other pastor...who told my dad...who just made sure i talked to s about it and why she told my pastor without telling me she was going to.
*sigh* i know you're concerned girlie. but really? what is there to be concerned about? i'm not gonna get drunk. if i was going to, then i would've done so 2 new year eves back.

=> on a happier note. i graduated from physio!!! this means that i'm....no not back to 100% but getting there...soon. just need to strengthen it some more; only what i can work on myself, nothing physio can help with. Thank God that i switched to my mom's physio, recovery was so much faster after that.

=> i.
miss.
him.

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Into The Sunrise.

2009-05-22T01:48:00.002-04:00

=> youth retreat this year was AH-MAY-SHING!!

shouts to vince who introducted ghetto taboo to us. (the funnest game ever). it's just like taboo, except you write your own cards and there's 3 rounds. the first round, is normal taboo. the second round is charades, but since you're using the same cards, you already know what they might be possibly acting out. the third round is taboo but only allowed to say one word to describe the card.
as "plain" as it sounds in writing, it's actually really really really really really really fun...it's just that you all end up yelling the answers and you might loose your voice later.
well the equation actually goes: ghetto taboox2 + popcorn + talking for four hours + lack of sleep = fun times + watching sun rise + voicy go bye bye

=> and so since i lost my voice over the long weekend, it didn't help that i just got it back yesterday. and today i go to wonderland for a field trip. which well since i missed my voice so much that i just kept talking (even though i couldn't yell during the rides...i did talk through a few of them though). so then tonight...at the end of charis' coffeehouse, my voice almost left again and now i have everyone advising me to stop talking...

=> ELEPHANT!!

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Line Of Limits.

2009-05-09T01:56:00.001-04:00

=> has it even clicked into his head that he has a girlfriend? If it has then why on earth does it seem like he’s chasing me like a german shepherd going after a drug dealer? I really have no clue what on earth is going on anymore or how I should be reacting. First off I’m in partial wtf whytheheck.. shock as the line becomes gray going “dot dot dot, crap what should I do..crap ugh. Whatever then..?” Then there’s the part of me wants to ask, “wtf are you doing? You have a girlfriend and I’m not interested. Get your hand off me.” and then there’s a third part of me that’s just really curious about how far he’s going to go until he think it’s too far.
ms gf, now hear this out. I have no intentions of being the other woman, I have no intentions of stealing your boyfriend (I’m not and nothing like she who must not be named), I am not interested in your boyfriend (I have my eyes on someone else). In other words, he’s all yours and despite what you might seem to think or hear or whatever, I’m not doing anything; I’m simply being a girl and acting normally as I would with any other person (ie. flinching when getting poked in the sides). I’m stating this only because I can only assume (yes I know that by assuming I’m making an ass out of u and me but) that you’re upset with me or something seeing as though how you don’t say hi to me at all anymore and being very un-you-like. So forgive me of any impressions I’ve made, I have no intentions of anything at all.

=> physics need to die. Stupid physics, stupid projects (though I’m quite happy with the car…hopefully the results will reflect the consistency that I had achieved during my home and pre-class trials), stupid school…

=> I need… a block of gelatin and a knife.

Everything Changes.

2009-05-02T01:16:00.003-04:00

=> so i was just randomly thinking today and i don't know if it was just because sharon was mentioning retreat to me while walking to our bus stop, but anyways. yea i was just thinking about what we did at retreat last year, what everything was like both at retreat & church and other things in my life. then i noticed that alot has changed while other things were like, "omg it's been a year!?"
it just seems like the conditions were so different back then:

then: the falling out between me and she who must not be named was JUST beginning to start.
now: ugh. just ugh. (see old posts)

then: we've all just began to REALLY get worried about K.
now: still praying for her. still looking for quotes in the Bible and in books for her. yet to get to sit down and talk to her though...(to be put on my to do list)

then: me and saki started taking the first majorer steps in healing our "wtf happened in gr6? bff to ihateyouguts in 2 secs?" thing. to be honest, i was a bit "alrighty then, first test, mayfair's chalk off, drawing a moose eating sushi together..."
now: THANK GOODNESS we're back to normal again. as normal as normal can get anyways, but actually probably even closer now than before.

then: the Sr.s of ezekiel = the Sr.s of silas = the ones i look up to =)
now: they're all off to uni, well actually DONE their first year of uni.

then: infatuation with liam's amazing eyes.
now: they're still as gorgeous as ever except i don't get to see him as often now.

then: one year today...or well yesterday since its 1 in the morning, shout out to joanne's bday. even though she had her party a few laters, same diff. which honestly it seemed like only last month...but then again i remember that i was still using maybelline great lash.
now: just finished making and sending her personalized e-pic-card (ecard but with a picture of themselves via the if0nly dictionary) around an hour ago. covergirl lashblast all the way; can't wait to get lashblast luxe.

ahaha well that seemed like a history lesson disguised as a blog... whatever LOL. nighty nights!!

Still Not Back? & Forever Princess.

2009-04-27T02:08:00.004-04:00

=> so since my shrink still isn't back from ny... *glares*
argh why are you always out of town when i'm in near breakdown? anyways instead of my explaining it later and trying to remember deets, i'm just gonna get you to read this ;)

=> well it started off with sunday school and brought up the topic of forgiveness or something (it's one of the ones of the beatitudes). then sharon gives me "the glare" hinting of the questions again "hem hem, shouldn't you be forgiving (she who must not be named) and let it be water under te bridge like the good little christian girls we are already?" yea i just went "shhhhh *hmph* we're not going there right now..."

flash forward and we're on msn. so i see that her pm's quote (sharon i really hope you don't mind me quoting you since pm's are seen to the public anyways), "hate you? well i wouldnt say hate.forgive you? thats a hard one.care bout you? yea thats hard too". so i tell her that even though we're talking about 2 diff situations, her pm was exactly my point.
and then this convos goes on again like every other time. her JJWD vs my, "you have no clue".
cept we actually made more progress i guess today... at least we laid down more of what happened and that i'd EVENTUALLY talk to she who must not be named and smooth things over, but that's after i can actually look at her without wanting to stab her.
but it was still really really horrible having to go back and open up healing stitches again (i even had to start dinner a few minutes late cause i couldn't take it downstairs and had to hide out in my room for a while) especially since it was only friday that she who must not be named was standing there in the hall in my way.
and then you just HAD to be in ny -_-

=> on a happier note and something that my shrink doesn't have to read if he doesn't want to.
i stayed up till 3:45am last night reading forever princess (which would explain why i wasn't too sharp during sunday school). the conclusion of the princess diaries series. 8/8 (or at least i think there were 8). the book was soooo cute! i read it all in 2 days. like over 3/4 of it during the day yesterday and over 1/2 of it at night.
if you havn't read any of the princess diaries yet, i advise you to go out and start reading them! omg as if the first few books wern't cute enough, the last one is OMG REALLY REALLY CUTE!!! there's the begininng story line with mia as a 9er. then throughout the years she's still writing in her journals, well even though technically she writes in gr9 and 10. then in the last book it jumps to her in gr12 and explaining that she pretty much spent gr11 writing a novel. i don't want to give any of it away but it is such a girly romantic ending that's sooooo very cute.

Just Because It’s Weird In It’s Own Way Doesn’t Make It Wrong…Or Does It?

2009-04-27T01:56:00.002-04:00

=> well it’s not like there’s anything going on. In fact, I havn’t seen him since summer. But all the same I can’t rid that thing at the back of my mind that’s going, “omg our hugs are amazing!! It’s like everything just fades away and its just us, making seconds seem like minutes in my memory.” “ugh this is wrong in so many ways, the no mac(and cheese) rule was there for a reason kiddo; he’s taken now too anyways.” “But but but… the hugs!!! =(” and yes, I have convos with my brain. Well I guess in the meantime I’ll just have to hug other people haha, “bring in the subs!”

=> yea so um, since I’m typing these posts via my mini laptop aka lapbook (but I rather call it a mini laptop), I’m not going to be able to sign off these posts properly since the coding for it is in a “sticky note” on the desktop.

=> there is a vid a found on some site (via my friend’s msn pm) which I then youtubed. In summary, it’s a spoof of the dove commercial back a few yrs ago about the evolution of beauty. I now bring to you *insert drum roll* the evolution of facebook pics.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r6aBp4vJnj8

=> and um since my "shrink" is in NY with his school (yes arjun, you‘re my shrink now, which only means you’ll have me badgering you more about my many issues)…I have no one to whine to about stuff I can’t whine to sharon about, aka having she who must not be named standing in my way after school today. Yes I still wanna punch the living daylights out of her, the only reason why I rather not? Don’t really want that much crap on my school transcript after getting dragged into a cat fight last year (which’s another story for another day) nor do I wanna spend my school years in jail for homicide (or maybe it’ll be 2nd degree murder if I get too carried away with actually “punching the living” part). Ugh it’s not like I don’t want to put this all behind me. But when you wasted two yrs on a friendship that you later find out was filled and based on lies and other junk, it’s just kinda hard. Oh and not to mention’s it’s made me paranoid that she might be ripping my friends away from me slowly one by one. WHICH I’m happy that she has yet done so, or at least successfully done so.

Chastity Workshop via Rev. (some last name i can't remember right now...)

2009-04-27T01:52:00.002-04:00

=> these are the notes i took from a workshop at my church about chastity.

=> love processing. (could have been 'love possessing' but this is what happens when you're taking notes on your phone)
1) having favourable impression
2) missing
3) confessing
4) accepting
5) dating
6) changing

=> high school friends last a lifetime. (hey, isn't that what i said in my letter to j?)
therefore, hold stronger relationships with friends. develop more peer relationships than romantic ones.

=> to date does not mean you have to have pyhsical intimacy. you won't die if you don't have intimate lust. it's like drugs, where you'll never be satisfied.

=> lust possessing (ok this one i'm sure its 'possessing') [to be thought of as 'levels']
1) get close to
2) hold hands
3) embrace
4) kiss
5) fondle
6) sexual contact
7) sexual intercourse
possible 8) stds & pregnancy (to be lead to the question of abortion)
the attraction to advance to then next 'level' will grow as you reach the previous 'level'
=> intimacy boundary.
where should we place it? or not have a boundary at all?
since it's very difficult to have self control and stop at lvl 7) so stop at 6). because of the attraction and temptation to proceed at 6), stop at 5). so stop at 4), 3), 2), 1)?
so accordingly, stop at 2) and be looking deeply into the person's personality and inner being. stay away from the physical stuff.

=> there are more temptations nowadays than back in the bibical times. God has a greater expectation from us. we have been specially selected to show the strength of chastity.

=> 2 corinthians 11:2
maintaining pure for christ and for your future spouse
psalms 139:13-16
He saw our unformed body, written our life plan already. know from the beginning of the beginning.

1 corinthians 6:18-20
2 timothy 2:21-22
1 thessaloians 4:3-5

we will never be asked to face sexual immorality. we are simply told to flee from it. (note: joseph feeing from madien)

=> 80% lose virginity at home. fleeeeeeeeeee
abortions can haunt you even as an elderly having had an abortion in teenage years. abortion and pregnancy at a young age can up risk of ovarian cancer.
it is equal to ripping out baby's page in the book of life. we have no right to do so

=> no one likes their spouse to be experts at sex. they hope that they too are virgins.
many pre-marital sexual partners will result in “boredom” once married and turn to the likes of affairs.

think of the story of rebekah and issac, destined by God for each other. Can you guarentee that your bf/gf is your rebekah / issac? If not, think twice cause like wise, you wouldn’t want your rebekah / issac to have previously fooled around with by someone else.
=> pick a spouse that loves God with all their heart. Learn to pray for your future, for your rebekah / issac.

Oblivious To What You Know.

2009-04-24T00:06:00.002-04:00

=> as much as i want you to be un-oblivious to what you know...
it's only fact that i know if anything was to really happen between us, there's only 1 of the 3 possible outcomes that will end in happily ever after.
other than that 1, the other 2 will equivilate (equivalate?) in it blowing up in our faces and destroying everything that we've ever known.
it's a chance that i don't know if i'll ever be ready to take.

Seed. Flower. Seeds.

2009-04-19T01:54:00.003-04:00

=> From a Seed to a Flower which in return produces more Seeds. Hallelujah.

April 17th, 2009. the day that mrs. (insert her last name that i can't remember at the moment but i'm pretty sure it starts with a S) accepted christ and obtained her all access pass to being saved my Jesus Christ. age makes no difference; we are all children of christ whether we're 5, 16, or 70 something like mrs.S.
our church had a chinese outreach program thing that night. i was just helping out to watch the kids (relive my younger yrs, regress a it ;) ). so as we were leaving my dad went into the santuary to just say bye. next thing we know mrs.W tells us that mrs.S accpeted christ. so naturally we sit with them (along with a few others) just to see that she truely understands what it means to accept christ and to answer any questions that she may have for us.
one of the things she was worried about was because her whole family was worshipers of false idols, that they would be upset that she suddenly accpeted christ without discussing it with them first. and because of it she might get pressured to in a way "turn her back away" from God. being that she was chinese and didn't understand english, i wasn't able to say much. what i did tell her though in my broken and accented chinese was, "you're like a seed that will bloom into a flower. from you as a flower, will then produce so many more seeds. these seeds would be you're whole family."

as on the spot as this analogy came to me (well maybe not the analogy of it, pretty sure it came of a sermon), but as on the spot as the wording came to me, i can truely feel that it's words that God's given to me. that the words could really have an impact on mrs.S that i'll never know of, especially given the fact that theres an age and language barrier. i had the first line of this post as part of my sn on msn; like sharon puts it, it really is cuteness. Hallelujah.

Late Much?

2009-04-19T01:32:00.002-04:00

=> well having you talked to me while i was in the library looking at funny lights, this post is sorta almost a week overdue haha. ANYWAYS i shall now proceed to copy this from my phone.

=> j,
first off, sry for typng this up so late. {stupid phone's backlight doesn't stay on long enough} school's always a factor and gets in te way. which btw IS important. note how i'm not telling you to put school first. becausse well face is, as important as it is, you always have to schedule in fun (sad now my idea of fun this week was helping look after some kids at church). but when you really really think about it, marks don't matter till a few yrs down the road. as long as you scrape by with a 75, you can still take full academic courses (not saying that you shouldn't try your best of course).
now that school's discussed, onwards to the next item on the list; friends. no matter what happens in hs, just remember that it's just hs. everyone acts like a bumbum. my goal for you is to find yourself a moose. find friends that have their morals set right and will stick by you though whatever bs you get yourself into. these are the ones that you pray will stay friends with even after hs when you're off to uni in lala land and for the rest of your life.
now about the boys. one thing that no one will ever understand. since i don't know exactly how your situation initially played out, but i have a feeling i can probs guess the gist of it. to try to get to te point and not make this drag on (like what it seems like i'm doing); Let the slut have the guy. i know this is going to sound cliche but i'm going to say it anyways. you deserve better than him. no guy who trash talks their ex deserves being taken back. now i know you were contemplating bout being friends and not bout getting back together but hear my point out. be careful about letting him back into your life because before you know it, one thing might lead to the next no matter what promise you've made to yourself or anyone else.
just remember kiddo, there's like less than 1/10000 chance of hs relationships ending with a fairytale happily ever after.
well i hope this helped! (no clue how much this will though since i'm drafting this out on my phone at 4:30 in the morning..anyways. Have FUN debating within youself ;)

=> wow...that was actually pretty long...and to think that was only 7 notes on my phone notepad. (thank God for qwerty)

forever xoxo,
- mag. (dangit, this sign off would've looked so much better if it was in my own handwriting)

Not Exactly Phobic.

2009-04-19T01:28:00.000-04:00

=> trembling with fear, pulse is at 100km/h, need air.

there's a spider right there.

=> yea so there was a spider in my washroom...couldn't get my daddy to kill it since he was downstairs and if i yelled for him my mom, being asleep would have woken up and told me to shush. SO i had to kill it myself... =s which didn't quite work out the way i wanted it to. i got the tissue paper, wet it and smacked the spidy. now i thought it was dead, so i was =O when it fell off the tissues and onto the rim of my toilet and started to walk again (tmi? sorry!). well i had to get rid of it, so what do i do? i blow it into the bowl. and then it started "swimming" and then went into a little ball as i flushed it. then i stepped back and hyperventilated shaking like crazy with the room spinning.

not that i'm arachnophobic...maybe in a weird strange way i am tough. see i'm perfectly fine with larger spiders like taranulas (other than their many many eyes, they're pretty cute ><). i can't stand the smaller ones though. there's just something about them and being able to pop up anywhere that freaks me out. the ones that are small AND fast and/or can jump, SUPER SCARY!

For Us He Died.

2009-04-10T14:19:00.002-04:00

=> easter is a time to reflect upon everything that God's done for us. reflect upon how much he loves us. about how he sacrificed his sinless son for us.
wait no... EVERYDAY should be that time to reflect upon how great is our God.

=> in comparison, having good friday and easter monday off is fairly miniscule. but its great to have a 4 day weekend all the same.
and smack in the middle of that weekend (or well sunday) is me getting baptized!!!
super excited but yet super nervous; theres going to be too many people looking at me while i share my testimony.

song diddily do!! - How Great Is Our God - Chris Tomlin
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0OsyiGgSlqY

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Uni Open House Summarized.

2009-03-23T16:03:00.004-04:00

=> sooooo at the end of a busy march break and having to wake up at 8 on average, its time for my thoughts on each uni that i visited.

sat: western - amazing campus. very organized. nice rez. as "old" as the buildings seemed, it was very new looking and modern. totally spoiled my family's expectations of all unis. and as an extra plus, the rink is on campus and open to free skate monday - friday during lunchish hours. the whole gym facility was amazing, spanking new and already paid for in part with your tuition or living expenses etc.

wed: queens - yes i still love the bphe program. but here's where they get knocked down from my first choice to 4th-ish. my faculty is under construction. aka everything is being torn down and rebulit. now most of the stuff will be completed by the time i get there but the rink isn't done until 2012...which is just a tad bit far away. and also, the rez washrooms are =s

thrus: UT - it's huge! luckily my program is a fairly good size with 140 people, but there still might be classes that are located at the other side of downtown. ut's program is combined of kin and phe but put under bphe. so the good thing about that is in case m.ot doesn't work out i can simply take b.ed and go teach gym or work in something gym related. and i get to just fool around and have fun in different sports for 1/2 the day, eg. fencing, gymnastics, dance etc. rez was ok, not as nice as western's but livable all the same. the rooms seemed bigger actually...

sat: mcmaster - like western, the campus had a nice feel to it. buildings were up to date, nice and modern. rez was by far the best! totally fell in love mary keyes and les prince. the walls in mary keyes were so colourful too!!!! even the most ancient rez was nice, and that was building in the late 1800s or something. the kin program, as amazing as we've been advised they were, the competition is to the max and cut off is 87...havn't gotten that high in 2 years.

see now if i could make my own little uni, i would take the rez of mac, program of UT / queens, and campus & facilities of western. and a cut off avg of 80 so its at least achievable.

=> song from me: lifehouse - everything
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cyheJ480LYA
i always love watching this skit =)
ooo i found a homemade music vid for it too! and btw it is equally amazing
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nig4Rbeoqwk

song from AS: lifehouse - broken (really lifehousey today)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZXHYItXWqE

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Uni Open House Update.

2009-03-20T01:42:00.002-04:00

=> coming soon... heehee
*shhhh* =)

March Break Uni Open Houses.

2009-03-14T01:07:00.003-04:00

=> open house #1 = western. get there around 9? dammit, too early *sigh*
#2 queens. ugh, far and probs early
#3 ut. closer...but still no sleeping in
#4 mcmaster. ugh another far one. me go zzzzzz
how some all the unis that have BSc & MOT are so far =s

=> i guess i can always just to go york for kine... it's closer...don't have to wake up as early for the open house...its in april or soemthing though...

Seven Questions

2009-03-12T01:08:00.003-04:00

=> Quick post.
Made a new quiz (after like over a yr long hiatus since the last entry was for a project) on quizilla. It's to determine where your heart is for your guy..or girl...or dog...or who/whatever.

=> Linkie: http://www.quizilla.com/quizzes/9027096/seven-questions

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Knee, Room, And Everything Else.

2009-03-11T01:33:00.004-04:00

=> Blah!! No new bloggies in a while... sorry bout that. So I guess just a few updates on what's been doing on in the life of Me.

=> Knee. Oy, trouble trouble trouble. So at first, people were wondering if maybe I tore a tissue or ligament or that it was my acl. Thank God that it wasn't. Then maybe it could have been my miniscus. It totally seemed like it, but again thank God that it wasn't. After a whole lotta glabalaga (aka 2 x rays, ultra sound, hospital visits, specialist, mri scan, & health card malfunction) it turns out that it was just tendonitis. A very painful case of tendonitis too I might add. The pros are thinking that since I already have osgood schlatters disease on my right knee, tennis just put too much strain on it.
Once I got an accurate diagnosis from the MRI scan, I saw a physiotherapist which didn't help so I went to go see a sports medicine guy/ chiropractor. And after seeing that clinic for 3 months, it's over 90% better. There's still pain when I stand too long and not moving, or if I'm walking for too long, and feels loose if I don't have a strap on or a tensor..or going up too many steps of stairs, can only go up around 1/2 of the flight at home. Now that I can walk relatively well though, I'm going to be seeing my mom's physio (which she says is amazing) which I have an appt booked tomorrow...or pretty much later on today.

=> ooo I just had to tell my health card story. So i go to get my mri done, the reception scans my card and then tells me, "you're card's been cancelled, have you moved lately?" "nope..." "have you gotten a letter saying that they're going to be cancelling your card? cause i know they're doing that to phase out the old card." "nope." "hm... ok that's weird. so i guess leave your credit card number with us for now and get your health card within 5 work days or else we'll have to charge you or you can book another appt." "um...well i don't want to book another appt so i guess i'll leave the number."
So then come monday i go get my new health card...omg it was such a long line up *sigh* but at least it eventually got done. At the counter, we asked the guy what was up with my card. He checked the computer and told us that he has no clue since it was not shown that my card was scheduled to get cancelled or anything. "Oh ok then..." So now both me and my daddy have the new health cards. =)

=> Reno update. Oh golly this post will be long. Washroom is pretty much done, just need to fill in the sparklies on the bubbles one of these days, then PICTURE POSTING!!! As for my room, i'm done painting it, with designs and all that. Don't know if i'll post pics of that yet since my dad still has to finish installing the hardwood and I need to move back in to get the full feeling of the room. But omg the "mural" is sooooo pretty, took me forever but it's sooooo pretty.

=> So um, now for the everything else, and actually why i'm posting agan. I just had to get this out somehow. Well I'm getting baptised this Easter and part of it is writing out our testimony. Now see, my testimony revolves quite alot around one of my skating coaches who past away and caused me a whole lot of heartache, reality check, and fear.
It's almost been four years now and I'm pretty good with the fact after now. It's just that everytime when i have to write out the story and everything i felt the one or so years after he died i end up reminiscing about the last time i saw him, his last intructions to me. Except this time, i don't want to reminisce in fear that it will affect my ability at co-op and school which is why percisely why i decided to post this little tidbit and release the inhibitions into cyberworld. It'll get more space to run around instead of being confound to the quarters of my own feeble mind.
Hm...maybe i'll post a briefed version of my testimony one day...Easter perhaps?

=> song from me: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uVTihByqA6E

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

To Make Do.

2008-10-13T23:40:00.004-04:00

=> we never know what going to happen in life.
are we going to be able to do this?
are we going to be going to here? or there?
and the questions can go on and on and on.

=> who knew last week, or even on friday that i would be able to go to the park by saturday and go kite flying...or would it be kite-ing...or maybe ATTEMPTED kite-ing. also getting bruised from a spinny thing as well *hemhem*
you'd think i'd be more careful since i'm not even 100% back to normal yet...even though i was never quite at 100%.

and then come sunday, we had an extra pass for great wolf lodge.
we never planned that i was going to go water parking this weekend, the stairs would have been quite hard...
and .: joanne was supposed to recplace me, but no my sister ended up out for the weekend, so that meant 1000000000000 steps of stairs for me. whoopdeedoo...
no, but really, i had fun even if i WAS climbing the stairs qutie slowly.
and THEN walked around the falls for a good hour or so, shooting pics etc.

today, the actual turkey day...or was yesterday the actual turkey day...
but yea, today, Canada One Outlets for at least 2 hours.
Body Shop. UP. the rest of the prices wasn't too "outlety". in fact they were pretty much mall prices not very on sale.

=> guess what? saturday, sunday, monday = walking without crutches!!!! YAY!!! too bad i still need a knee strap...

=> song from AS: listen - beyonce
http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=P1n1BWLsyHg
song from me: bones - the killers
http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=ar5BKXg60ME
(jon got it stuck in my head since saturday -_-)
(never knew that tim burton had part in the vid...hm...)

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Since No One Knows.

2008-10-04T14:52:00.012-04:00

=> why have i been getting different diagnosises (diagnosi?) everytime i see a doctor?
finally someone expalined it. christine says that its because i'm showing some signs of a possible this, but then if it was this i couldn't be able to do that.its undetectable of what / where the pain is coming from.
doesn't seem to be my minuscus anymore (good thing too! that was such a scare!), nor does it seem to be inflammed tendon.
2 weeks of hobbling around. 1 more week until great wolf lodge.
at least christine has started a general treatment for me already. ultrasound and electric currents. it tickles. =)
so glad someone told us about VWClinc way back when.

=> song from AS's What are you listening to right now 3? thread: Is It Love - Iio
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5dp9Tpj88-g
song from me: Be The Change - Sebastian Demrey
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dUW6bz1ocjs
i'm guessing that it should be one of shasha's new fave songs ;)

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

I'd Rather Her Not Talk To Us And Not Be With Him Than Have Her Talk To Us But Still With Him.

2008-09-25T17:31:00.009-04:00

=> when a friend is in a relationship thats abusive, you just can't help it but be utterly frustrated. frustrated that she doesn't realise that it's abusive. frustrated at how busy and what an incoveince our lives are so you can't just grab her out to coffee right now and then.

she was such a sweet loving girl living her life fully in Christ.
and its not her that i'm mad at, its him. her stupid ass boyfriend has pretty much taken control of every aspect of her life.
soon, its going to be "her" fault that we're still her friends and that we still love her. that he hasn't gotten rid of us yet.
well you know what O, you don't have no control over us like you have over her. we're not letting our friend get hurt anymore than she has already, i don't care what it takes, she's returning to the path of sanity very soon.

we all noticed the change in her. we all have our reasons of why we don't like him.
with him, she's done things that we never thought she'd ever do.
as quickly as his irrational decisions, he's taking away her very being piece by piece. with each tear that trickles down her cheek and each fracture that it put in all of our hearts.

K, we love you so much and we know that you've suffered more than enough. we know you think that we don't understand why you're seemingly putting in so much effort and ache into this relationship you have with O.
and you're right, we don't. we don't understand why you can't see that this ISN'T how a relationship should be.
you shouldn't be scared; we shouldn't be scared for you.
you shouldn't be crying youself to sleep; we shouldn't be sleepless over worrying about you.
please K, please believe us when we tell you that O isn't who you seem to think he is. please believe us that we only want what's best for you and that his behaviour isn't what's best for you.

sorry to be blunt but O's "love" isn't love.
we love you K, we really do.
i love you K, i really do.

=> song from me: Jesus Loves You - Stellar Kart
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tks53PEWPSw

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

His Ways.

2008-09-21T23:41:00.002-04:00

=> God has a funny and neat way of doing things doesn't he?
my pastor told this story today as part of his sermon.

=> "back when i was a youth, my fellowship was really evangelistic and outreachy.
pretty often we would have newcomers.
this week we were going out around the community to talk to people about Christ.
this week we had a non-believer come visit.
the non-beliver came along with us to spread the word.
that day, someone got saved.
God was able to use the non-beliver to tell another non-beliver about Christ.
he accepted Christ to be his saviour even though the one tell him about Christ was a non-beliver himself."

=> God has his ways. He can save a non-beliver via a non-believer. Amen.

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Aches And Pains.

2008-09-20T23:22:00.001-04:00

=> friday period one.
walking over to kez's desk, la dee da dee da.
stop at her desk. huh? wtf why did my right knee give out all of a sudden.
eh whatever.

period two.
owie...why does my knee feel like its being stabbed from the inside when i walk on it?
hm maybe its because of the soft bone inflation. hopefully it'll be gone after a while.
good thing i'm sitting down for lunch anyhow.

period three.
walking up and down the aisle between the desks seeing if i can figure out what's wrong.
this is weird...sometimes it hurts sometimes it doesn't, sometimes it hurts more than other times.

period four.
wow my knee's not hurting anymore yay!!

period five.
ow ow ow ow ow HUH?! its back again?
ugh ok fine.
walking to the tennis courts 2 km away. la dee da dee da.
oh that wasn't too bad, maybe i could play.
good match desh.
no creepy kid you can't challenge me, i'm injured.
so u m mr kong, my knee feels like someones stabbing me. "ok then just sit and you can go in around 5 minuites with someone."
no creepy kid, i told you already, no game today my knee's busted.
bye vince, btw nice slow biking skills being able to keep up with an injured person.

after school.
oh crap how am i supposed to go home, ugh.
sharon? what are you doing at the theatre?
*gasp* your mommy can drive us today?! YAY! i don't have to die just yet!

=> saturday morning.
nice! my knee seems to be fine now.
morning routine, leaning towards the left just in case.
ow...knee...ow...left backside...ahhhh!!!!
dr. lau! dr. lau! dr. lau! i feel owied. =(
"ok well you probably just snapped something small 'in' your knee so just give it rest and see how it goes on monday. if its not better by then, come by again and maybe get it x rayed."

noon.
ow. can't sit. can't walk.
yay! my aunt's pretty butterfly cane's here!

night.
ugh. still owie.
[insert the concerned vioces of many members of my parent's cell group and my youth group] "what happened? what's wrong? how did it happen? why the cane?"
[repeat many times] "snapped something in my right knee, leaned too much on my left so now my backside hurts."
alternative response from kevin. "i beat her up."

now.
ow. bye. ow

=> song from absolute skating what are you listening to now 3? thread: Morningside - Sara Bareilles
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qthxPKFl3G8
song from me: When Your Spirit Gets Too Weak - Plus One
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4nT7XuQFZMQ
the rest of their songs are REALLY boy band. so if that suits you then go wild ;)

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Stand Up.

2008-09-07T17:11:00.001-04:00

=> i was going to write this blog on friday after watching stand up to cancer, but then having got a new laptop i was busy till like 12 setting it up and making recovery discs.

=> iunno if it's just because i've seen how cancer affects people or if its because they did a VERY good show, but that hour was really touching. there really are people getting diagnosed or dying every minute. treatments really do damage patients. not only is it painful for the patients but its mentally painful for those around them too. luckily there ARE cancer survivours. and praise God for that too.

a family friend from church got diagnosed with osteosarcoma a bit over a year and a half ago. its a childhood cancer which affects the bone. she had to amputate her leg, but is now doing really well rehabilitating. it is actually her that got me to look into going into physical rehab / physiotherapy.
even though unfortunate things may come our way at times. we always have to rememeber, God loves all of us and He has a plan for all of us. everything happens for a reason; we'll learn something, get something out of everything that happens.

=> if you want to read about Cassidy's Journey: http://cassidysheng.blogspot.com/
if you want to donate to stand up 2 cancer: https://www.standup2cancer.org/donate_splash.asp

=> song from absolute skating's our favourite songs (sharing) thread: iris - goo goo dolls
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SsK90GWBVLY
song from me: stand up to cancer - various artists
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ssKKy5d-l-I

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Ouch.

2008-09-04T19:27:00.002-04:00

=> owie ow ow ow! today was such a painfilled day =/
period 1 (hospitaliy) - i fall backwards and fall on the fridge. right above the back of my ankle is skinned around an inch in length.
period 5 (gym) - got lazy so i threw the football back while i was still lying on my back. bad idea. hit my head back on the ground.
then running for the ball i collide with this other guy and hit the ground. so that the side of my head now throbbing too and a funky feeling left knee.
then at the other end of the field the same thing happens but i collide with someone else. adds on a grass burn the size of a quarter to my right kneee, funky feeling on left palm, and briusey grass burned-ish right shoulder. having a soft bone being inflated in my right knee, lets just say that knee hitting ground felt a whole lot worse than the grass burns.
then just to top it all off, being already all breathless and out of shape, the football bounces off my chest. i can hardly catch for jello.
once back home i hydrogen peroixed EVERYTHING

=> making myself a little treat. jello with 2 layers. inspiration from one of those dim sum asian resturants nearby. one layer was originally red bean in geletin but since i have no red beans, i subsituted it with craisins!!! the other layer is, i'm guessing milk since that was the description is on the menu, so i'm gonna try that out as soon as the 1st layer sets

=> song from AS what are you listening to 3? thread: new version of you - JJ Abrams
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qSMKeahZzMw
song from me: presupposition - joel geleynse
-> he's a christian artist and the meaning behind this video IS christian based dispite what the first "blamm" of the visuals may be
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PnF6M5IFQPk

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

A New Circle Of Life.

2008-09-02T20:48:00.001-04:00

=> well, i guess this is the last night before school starts up again. this summer was probably actually more productive than last summer, sadly i had summer school for half my summer for BOTH years.
as so it happens, time moves on forward whether you want it to or not. there are new niners, last years niners are now tens, tens are now elevens, elevens are going to be graduating, the grads are off to universities far far away.
such a fresh new looking agenda with only corner tags ripped until this week. contact and emergency contact information written in. in ten months time it'll just become another booklet with pencil markings, pictures...and just a waste of trees. well at least it'll be useful for the time being. new clean nicely self designed crisp file folders. by the end of the year, they'll be raggity and un-crsip. hopefully my pencil case, pens, pencils will stay in tact =)

=> song from absolute skating's what are you listening to now 3?: with you - sum 41
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cDjlZj8f_t4
song from me: give until there's nothing left - relient K
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ZACEwihl2U

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

If0nly On Ice.

2008-09-01T00:36:00.001-04:00

=> from the creators who brought to you if0nly Life Was Fantasy., now brings you if0nly On Ice.!
hope those of you interested in ice...or not, will enjoy my blog all skating related.
quoting joanne (not the hairyone, the one from far far away) "wow.. i have no idea who any of these ppl r yet u still make it interesting enough for me to read :D nice job"
well anyhow, hope you all give it a chance =)

=> in the redoecorating scene, bathroom only needs to have 3 sand dollars painted (waiting for actual wall paint) and glitter for my bubbles.
room-wise, started sanding. no clue how on earth people can breath in those masky things. can we say suffocating? suffocating!

=> made 2 iron melted plastic things today...well sorta 3. tiffy put together one which i ironed for her. made 2 out of the "beads" that were left. i WAS going to make a heart but then since the template was a circle...wasn't too possible. took me pretty much the whole night to figure out a design to create.
the small black, white, blue, glow in the dark (greens) one was made first. so the "original".
the bigger white, blue, black, red one was made later just to finish off the beads. i left the iron on too long for this one so it over melted...

i scanned it with the lid? cap? top? that closey thingy open so thats why the grey liney background.

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Redecorating Two Point Oh.

2008-08-30T16:19:00.001-04:00

=> i've been working on my room and bathroom for how long now? a week or a bit over maybe? after all this you have a whole new appreciation for constuction decorating people. its hard work.
BUT BUT BUT i'm almost done my bathroom and just finished taping up my room. pics will be coming asap.

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Redecorating.

2008-08-27T00:54:00.003-04:00

=> painting is sooooo tiring. the fumes really do make you kinda hazy...or maybe that was all the bailey's i drank today. painting all this week i think. bathroom almost done, just need the stenciling to do tomorrow. bedroom needs patching up first, sand, paint, stenciling, moving back in.
meaning that i'ma gonna have paint on my nails all week. to think i just finished them by painting a shimmery top coat this morning.

=> movie review: watched persuit of happiness this morning, not all of it since my mom started it up while i was still sleeping but i watched probably half or more.
very sensational movie. its not men in black action or fresh prince comedy. it really makes you appreciate what you have. after watching this i went downstairs to get myself a lunch, i saw all the stuff we were cleaning out and all the food we had avaliable to us and just went "omg. we are SO SO blessed."

=> song from absolute skating's what are you listening right now 3? thread: Soulmate - Natasha Bedingfield
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZbITxYgtlAY
song from me: pretty baby - vanessa carlton
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AgAv12M8Fa4

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

The Bother.

2008-08-22T00:48:00.002-04:00

every one has something that's bothering them at this moment right? i mean no one can possibly be happy go lucky 24/7
well i'll tell you mine straight up, let me just vent this out

=> girl fight. cold shoulders. make up? sister unknowingly emails hate mail. re:. read..trash..read..trash..read..trash..read..trash..read..trash..read..trash..read..trash..
think about that going on and on and on inside your head for a good month.

have a friend who'd most likely be able to figure out what's for my best interest. he's in england for the summer.
have a friend who helps me get the load off my shoulders. he's as undecideful as i am on this.
have a friend who can look after me and counsel me. she's biased.

i'm in a rut
rut rut rut
stuck in a rut
stuck in a sut
stuck in a rut
i'm in a rut
rut rut rut
stuck in a rut
stuck in a rut today!

song of my head: i've got the joy - george cooke
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dOM3vhdJst4
song from absolute skating what are you listening to 3?: Hymne a l'amour - Josh Groban
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y-qNtMKPp6E

ifonly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Well I Might As Well Keep This Going.

2008-08-19T00:51:00.001-04:00

now that a blog's started, maybe i should start vlogging too...

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.

Blog Number One.

2008-08-18T01:05:00.000-04:00

shouts to flo!! got me to set a blogger up :)

=> and now for my jalambering of this entry *drums*
recipes are hard to clean out and throw the "useless" ones away since you never really know what you'll be creating next.
taller people propably have an easier time redoing their room since they can reach the ceiling easier.
if i didn't go back for every typo i made...i have a feeling that this might be a pretty hard blog to read.
high of 18 with 50% chance of t-storms = no wonderland tomorrow. so i guess daddy gets his wish of me staying at home to help clean out the junk filled basement.

latest song from absolute skating - what are you listening to 3? => juicy - better than ezra
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gn4WXD9pI0g
random song from me => hit me with you best shot - vivian sormeland
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=icsk-wM5H6k

if0nly Life Was Fantasy.,
- Mag.